Some Barack Obama Firsts I Don't Want to Know

Barack Obama's historic win of the presidency was more than just an iconic moment in American history. It was a vindication of our core belief that anything is possible in the home of the free and the brave.

When wife Michelle, and daughters Malia and Sasha stand on the Capitol steps this January 20, 2009, beaming with pride as the first American of African descent -- President-Elect Barack Obama, their husband and father -- places his hand on the bible, swearing an oath of allegiance to the United States Constitution to uphold fundamental principles of fairness and liberty, the whole world will take stock of America's historic leap forward as we, the people, at last turn the page on one of the hardest fought victories in recent memory.

Still, I am humbly reminded that with every silver lining comes a cloud. You see, up until the precise moment of Obama's historic swearing in ceremony (and perhaps for a wee bit after), the entire world must endure a heavy burden indeed.

An unprecedented barrage of firsts.

The first time a major American newspaper endorses the Democratic Party's nominee for president.

The first time a man with African roots wins a presidential election.

The first time that man, Barack Obama, takes a top secret security level tour of the White House.

The first time the transition of a U.S. presidency is transparently documented on the Internet.

The first press conference of Barack Obama.



And on and on she goes. I'm not sure how much more I can stand. Come on, admit it. You're getting sick of it too.

I imagine there are will be many firsts for the new President-Elect, his family and for lack of a better word, entourage, but do we have to hear about every single one in mind-numbing detail? Here are a few I'd rather not:

-The first time Oprah Winfrey flies her entire studio audience to Washington, D.C. for the inauguration.

-The first time any type of stereotypical ethnic food is served on the White House menu.

-The first time a trash can basketball hoop is installed in the Oval Office.

-The first time Will.i.am and Obama Girl are invited to an official State Dinner.

-The first time an African-American White House staff member is mistaken for a member of the President's family.

-The first time President Obama and the First Lady rumple the sheets in the Lincoln Bedroom.

Okay. Okay. No flames. I know I went overboard on those last ones. Let's hope all the news outlets exercise greater restraint.